Tuesday, May 7, 2013

May 7: Fears

Day 7: The thing(s) you're most afraid of

Ideally, with this one I'd get all deep and share a few of my real fears, but those are just a little too personal. Honestly, I'm already working on overcoming many of those big, personal, life-altering fears. But don't get me wrong, I still have some!
As a matter of fact, I'll share one of them.

This one is fairly recent, like within the past few months.

I honestly fear marriage.
Well, maybe that's a bad way to put it.
I fear all of the negative outcomes that could be a result of a failed marriage.
I fear that my husband won't commit or he'll want out.

Over the last few months I had an inside look at a couple of my friend's marriages, and due to that I am actually scared to death to get married.
To the point that I'm not even thinking about it, I don't want to think about it, and I'm planning to avoid it for the next few (four or five) years.

Now before I get a bunch of people getting all preachy on me, I know that marriage is hard but can be amazing. I've had, and continue to have, incredible examples of amazing and strong marriages in my life.
I know it's possible.
I'm a Marriage and Family Studies minor, I understand the importance of marriage, and I will get married one day.

What I'm afraid of is marrying someone who will just decide they want out.
Or end up not being who I thought they were.
Maybe they will change and end up different than they ever thought they would be.
It could be a million different things, and that's what I'm afraid of.

Don't worry, I'll get over it, but for now I'm sticking to living my own independent and happy life.
Bad point of view? Oh well.
I'll get married when it's right (but I'm just seriously hoping it's years from now.)

3 comments:

Amanda Schroeder said...

I don't think this is a bad point of view. I seriously had this same fear! I was FREAKING out. One of my biggest fears was falling out of love. And marriage requires a lot of work. But I truly believe when you find the one you're meant to be with, everything will make sense, and if you try hard, work hard at your marriage & serve your spouse, you will be just fine. I promise!

we&serendipity

Nicole said...

Very interesting, and I agree... I think at one point I felt that way as well. I won't get preachy on you or anything, but one piece of advice I have for you is get married for all the right reasons. I hope that someday the best happens for you!!

Christina @ The Murrayed Life said...

I think the most important bit is to get married if and when you feel ready. There's nothing out there saying you should or have to, and getting married at the wrong time or to the wrong person usually ends in awfulness. And I think it's a totally rational fear to have, especially if you do get a sneak peak of marriages with major things going on. Enjoy your solo time to its fullest! :)



blogger template by lovebird